Getting married? Need to book a marriage officiant?

Here are the steps required to book a marriage officiant. 

• Contact a religious institution such as your local mosque to connect with a registered officiant. ​Imam Services also has a number of registered clergy that we can connect you with for your ceremony. 
• To verify your officiant is actually registered with the government to perform your ceremony, visit this link: https://data.ontario.ca/dataset/registered-marriage-officiants
• Your officiant will require details from you such as time and place for the event.  
• We highly recommend to have a meeting with your officiant to iron out all the details for your ceremony. Do not forget to have your marriage licence for the event. 

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Getting married? Need a marriage licence?

Here are the steps required to obtain your marriage licence. 

• Contact your local municipality city hall to make an appointment. ​
• Take two pieces of government issued ID for both partners. One should be a photo ID. If you are divorced and are remarrying, you will be required to present your official divorce decree. 
• Take your debit or credit card to purchase your marriage licence. Every municipality has a different price. Current price in Toronto is $145.
• Your marriage licence usually expires in three months which means you must get married within three months after the marriage licence is issued. (Due to COVID-19 the expiry period has been extended.) 

Watch the video above for details. 

By Shaykh Yūsuf Badāt

Did You Know About the Following Muslim Divorces?

• The Prophet Muḥammad (peace and blessings upon him) divorced his wife Ḥafsa – (See: Sunan Abī Dāwūd)
• ʿOmar bin Khaṭṭāb (may God be pleased with him) divorced three of his wives, namely, Qarībah, Omm Kulthūm Malīkah and Jamīlah Bint Thābit – (See: Faṣl Al-Khiṭāb)
• ʿAlī Bin Abī Ṭālib (may God be pleased with him) divorced a number of his wives. – (See: Al-Bidāyah Wa Al-Nihāyah)
• ‘Abd Al-Raḥmān Ibn ʿAwf (may God be pleased with him) divorced his wife Tumāḍir Bint Al-Asbag. – (See: Tārikh Dimashq)
• Zayd bin Ḥārithah (may God be pleased with him) divorced three of his wives, Zaynab Bint Jaḥash, Umm Kulthūm Bint ʿUqbah and Durrah Bint Abī Lahab. – (See: Al-Bidāyah Wa Al-Nihāyah)
• ʿAbd Allāh Ibn ʿOmar (may God be pleased with him) divorced his wife. – (See: Ṣaḥīḥ Bukhārī)
• Ḥasan Ibn ʿAlī Ibn Abī Ṭālib (may God be pleased with him) married seventy times and divorced a number of his wives. – (See: Al-Bidāyah Wa Al-Nihāyah)
• Mughīrah Bin Shuʾbah (may God be pleased with him) married eighty times. He divorced most of his wives. – (Tārīkh Dimashq, Al-Bidāyah Wa Al-Nihāyah)
• The Prophet Muḥammad (peace and blessings upon him) had full intentions and made up his mind to divorce his wife Sawdah Bint Zamʿah. The only reason he didn’t was because Sawdah relinquished her rights and requested him not to, so she could be raised in the hereafter as one of the wives of Muḥammad (peace and blessings upon him) on Judgment Day. – (Tafsīr Al-Qurṭubīy)

Practicality of Islam

Unlike many cultures or religions, Islam provides a practical and realistic approach to every human situation. Marriage and divorce is no different. There is no sin, objection nor humiliation in divorcing when it is required.

Last Resort

Marriage is supposed to be forever. However, some marriages just do not work out. Islam encourages counseling, mediation and family therapy before taking the final step to dismantle the marriage relationship. If the couple has exhausted every effort possible to repair the marriage, the best option is for the couple to go their own ways, with peace.

“Divorce may be pronounced twice, thereafter either remain together honourably or depart with peace.” – (Qurʾān 2:229)

“There is no objection if you divorce your wives [for valid reasons].” – (Qurʾān 2:236)
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“To end a marriage for good reasons is allowed (mubāḥ) with no dislikeness (karāhah). Divorce is praiseworthy (mandūb) where marital rights are not being fulfilled and there is too much discord.” – (I’elā Al-Sunan)

Types of Divorce in Islam

• Rajʿīe: This is when the husband pronounces one divorce to the wife. He may reconcile with his wife within 3 menstrual cycles.
• Bāin: This is when severe words of divorce are pronounced. The couple can only reconcile after a new marriage contract takes place, following the ‘iddah (required waiting period).
• Mughalladhah: When 3 pronouncements of divorce are made. In such a situation the couple cannot reconcile.

(See: Qāmūs Al-Fiqh Li Al-Raḥmānīy)

Triple Divorce, An Evil Practice

The general notion [based on ignorance] is that in order to divorce, one must islamicaly pronounce the divorce three times. The reality is that issuing three divorce pronouncements whether all together, in a single instance or three separate intervals, is prohibited in Islam. A husband can end the marriage with one or two pronouncements of divorce, followed by the passing of three menstrual cycles, therefore there is no need nor requirement to pronounce three. Pronouncing three divorces is regarding as a bid’ah (reprehensible innovation in religion) by both classical as well as modern islamic jurists. This is why God states the maximum of two, when addressing the topic. See verse below:

“Divorce may be pronounced twice, thereafter either remain together honourably or depart with peace.” – (Qurʾān 2:229)

Wife Initiated Divorce

In Islam, a wife also has the right to initiate the divorce, where required, through the Khulaʾ and or Faskh procedure. In Khulaʾ , the wife initiates the divorce and usually gives up a religious financial right such as outstanding mahr (bridal gift) during such an Islamic divorce.
Faskh (annulment of the marriage) is applied in a scenario where the husband is either not fulfilling rights of the marriage or there is abuse. Both Khulaʾ and or Faskh have specific rules which must be adhered to when they are employed, on a case by case situation.

Separation in Islam

In Islam, a person is either married or not married. There is no such thing as an automatic marriage separation if one of the partners wants out, according to Islam (contrary to the western legal system). Separation in a marriage can only come into existence, islamicaly, if both spouses mutually agree to a separation. This is usually the case if both partners have serious issues and mutually agree to a separation period prior to formalizing any further decision of reconciliation or divorce.

Legal Divorce in a Non Muslim Country

There are two views among contemporary muslim jurists regarding the Islamic validity of a legal divorce issued in a non muslim court. One view is that a judge’s divorce decree from such a court, also automatically serves as an Islamic divorce. The other position is that it can only serve as an islamic divorce if the husband has signed the legal divorce documents. If not, the wife must seek her Islamic divorce through the Islamic Khula or Faskh procedures before or after a legal divorce.

Some Examples Where Divorce is Required in Islam

• A partner renounces Islam.
• A spouse leaves and walks out of the marriage for more than 4 months with no notice or intent of return.
• The spouse dislikes their partner’s bad character and habits to the extent that living with them is intolerable. Getting along with the spouse is impossible.
• A spouse dislikes the religious practice of their partner due to them being an open sinner and or transgressor. For example they constantly abandon mandatory religious practices, engage in illegal drugs, infidelity or criminal activity and or instructs the partner to commit sin. Living with such a spouse would negatively affect one’s own religious practice.
• A partner is physically or emotionally abused.
• A spouse does not fulfill mandatory rights of the marriage such as basic necessities and or intercourse.
• A spouse comes to know that their partner has undergone a sex change.

Conclusion

Even though divorce is not a pleasant matter, it is a necessity in many situations. Dismantling a marriage relationship is no easy feat however is praiseworthy in some situations.
As long as the institution of marriage has been in place, the rules and stipulations of ending a marriage, through divorce have also been applied.

“Live in peace or leave in peace.”

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By Shaykh Yusuf Badat

​Marriage is an important component of human life. In each of the stages of human growth (infancy, childhood, teenage period, adulthood and the final stage of old age), there are numerous privileges, challenges and responsibilities. When one passes through these phases of life, understanding and fulfilling rights and responsibilities, one is bound to experience peace, tranquility and bliss with oneself and also the people one is surrounded by. Marriage is something that is to last forever. This is why it is said, “marriage is not a ‘word’ rather a ‘sentence’… ‘a life sentence’”. Marriage is a union that unites a man and woman, making them so close to one another that they now function as one unit. Each partner becomes a pillar of support and kindness for the other. The following verse of the Noble Quran expresses this profound relationship;

They are apparel for you, and you are apparel for them. (Quran 2:187)

Looking into the depths of this verse, the following meanings are highlighted;

Closeness: 
Clothes are closely placed on our bodies. The inner garments we wear generally touch our skin. This perspective displays that the husband and wife are so closely attached to each other that they can confide in each other, sharing each other’s joys and sorrows without any hesitation what so ever.

Concealment: 
Clothing hides one’s nudeness. Body pimples, body hair, private organs etc. are all hidden from public view. In marriage, the couple are to hide each other’s personal blemishes and faults from others.

Exclusiveness: 
Our garments belong to us. They are our property and no one has the right to take them away. In a similar fashion, this verse points out that married couples are exclusive to their partners. This exclusivity bond ensures that the husband and wife will never cheat each other. They will always remain exclusive for one another.

Protection: 
One of the functions of clothing is to protect us appropriately from the climate and other dangers, whether it be the heat of the summer or the bitter coldness of winter.  Certain garments also protect from dust, snow and rain etc. On the very same token, the husband and wife protect each other from all forms of harm, abuse, hurt and injury. They build a home together in all goodness and peace.

Beautification: 
Our clothing makes us presentable and respectable. We feel good about ourselves when we wear nice, neat and tidy clothing. We feel dignified. The marriage bond is of a similar nature. Each partner beautifies the other and feels dignified through the marriage. They also beautify each other by teaching each other the good. They are there for each other emotionally, physically, socially and economically. Thus they beautify one another.

Marriage is an intimate bond. Both partners must do their best to maintain this bond. Some years ago an elderly man told me that his wife had passed away after a successful marriage of over 50 years. He indicated that he had enjoyed every moment of his marriage. I inquired the secret to the success of his marriage. He replied by declaring that two specific traits were always adhered to in their marriage. Firstly ‘respect’. He mentioned that since the day they married, they promised to each other that they would always respect each other, no matter what. This respect was always displayed in speech, communication, emotions and interaction. Respect in arguments as well. Secondly, the couple would not allow any disagreement to be an obstacle in the sweetness of their union. They ensured that they would settle their differences before the end of day.

This is indeed is an example of maintaining the bond of marriage. Let us strive to bring this bond alive through closeness, concealment, exclusiveness, protection and beautification.

The Quranic prayer is something that we should always ask for;
…and those who say, Our Lord, give us, from our spouses and our children, comfort of eyes. (Quran 25:74)